It really is sad. This is the most pathetic attempt at a blog that I've ever seen. Granted I haven't seen many blogs. But still, this is not what I had in mind for a daily discipline. I suck.
It seems that I have divided my "life change" and/or weight loss challenge into two seperate battles. And it seems that I feel unless I have both conquered, at the same time, that my goal will be reached. But if one falls to the way side, then the other must as well...because they go hand in hand. WELL...this is false. My two sides are 1. eating healthy and in moderation, and 2. regular excersize. While I do believe that these are both very important to a healthy life, it certainly is wrong to think I need one to accomplish the other. In fact, it's probably one of the main reasons I never conquer either!
Last week I started running with Jeff. He has been running for years and has a lot of really good information to help an amateur runner learn the ropes. He teaches me how to run properly, slowly and consistantly, and he also has all that biological (not sure if this is the right word??) information that keeps you from hurting for days on end after. I went for my first run (although greatly intimidated by his jedi running status) and found that I really enjoyed it! I didn't feel exhausted, I didn't hurt, and I felt ready to do it again the next day.
BUT, God gave me two left feet and an uncanny ability to hurt myself in any situation. So the next day while hiking down a very large mountain (to see this spectacular castle, but this is another story) I twisted my foot under itself and reinjured a fracture I acquired a year and a half ago. Yay for me.
So running was out for a little while.
AND this is where a normal person would say, ok since I can't excersize, I must eat more carefully and find other ways to kill the calories. But not I...no...not I. Instead in my head I hear, oh well you cant really tackle this problem until you can excersize anyway. So it's ok to have a little cheese after dinner, or an extra piece of icecream cake. ARGH! My brain is my enemy!
Ok, so this is a step. I'll acknowledge this. I'm admitting I have a problem. There is a bizarre barricade in my head that fights all will power to tackle this goal. I don't get it. Blah, I guess losing weight is more than just a physical fight, it's a whole Middle Earth meets the Death Star mental battle.
May the force be with me.
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